Turned on my cell phone this morning. 5 messages. Here's a transcript of those messages:
#1)6:40PM "Hey Alan, I thought you wanted me to come by. I guess you're not there if you're not gonna answer your phone. Call me back before I change my mind....Later"
#2)7:05PM "You're starting to piss me off...pick up the f***ing phone, slacker"
#3) 8:19PM "If you're out at the bar with Brian, I hope you're having a good time. Why did you ask me to come by? I can't sit here all night, I need to get out. I need something to eat. I'm about to go somewhere, so if you get this f***ing message call me on the cell phone." click
#4) 9:50PM (lots of noise in the background) "Stop by Friday's, your buddy is here. He wants to know where the hell you are, too. They have $1.25 beer specials, but they're out of Mich Light, bastards. You need to look at my car tomorrow its acting funny since I hit that curb. Where the f*** are you?" click
#5) 11:39PM "I sat in front of the gate for half an hour. NOBODY came through. (note: my apartment complex has a front gate that requires a remote control to open it so you can get in. She always follows somebody through it because I only have one remote and she ain't gettin it). If you were home I was gonna kick your ass. If you weren't home I was really gonna kick your ass. Call me tomorrow, mofo"
"You mean your ass was at home all night? And you never f***ing called me? Why not? You asked me like 5 times to come by and see you. I f***ing spend all day moving shit, I'm tired and all I want to do is chill out, but I spend all night trying to hook up with you only to find out you were sitting at home with your phone turned off? You f***ing slacker. Hey, meet me at Wal-Mart in an hour, about 2 o'clock. I have to get some stuff. Have you eaten anything yet? We could get some lunch and catch a beer buzz while you help me unpack boxes."